Bridging the Gap

Today, I had the good fortune of opening my email and noting that garbage’s career services had reached out to me inviting me to reconnect with some of the community. Please see subject line below:

“CELEBRATING OUR PAST BY CONNECTING WITH OUR COMMUNITY”


While I have no plans of attending my alma matta’s pathetic show of a dinner, I can not help but imagine what this function resembles for the sake of research:


http://img.alibaba.com/photo/10852889/Schweppes_Soda_Cans_Bottles.jpg

That being said, as a tribute to garbage I am going to make a list of what our community has to celebrate:

THANK YOU GARBAGE FOR THE FOLLOWING:

1. Recruiting me. Why, I believe it was the day after I took the LSATs when some Jehovah’s witness stopped by my dorm room in the middle of Ohio and handed me a pamphlet of all that garbage has to offer. The pamphlet made it clear that garbage had some of the best government connections in the nation.

2. Forcing Me to Pass the Bar on My First Try: It is with great pleasure that I announce that garbage’s passing rate has gone up from 10% to 45%. Part of the reason is that garbage students are not allowed to take any electives. In fact, I studied for the bar for a year and a half and took a mini bar on a weekly basis. While many other law students had the misfortune of passing the bar on the first time after just studying for three months post graduation, I was very lucky to have passed the bar multiple times before I even graduated.

3. Providing me with a study space: Thank you for providing me with the wonderful opportunity to study in a government owned building on the 13-20th floor for a year because you decided that a law school did not need a library. This was a really good way to acclimatize some of your brighter students to their future. They ended up on working on floors 1-12 post graduation.

4. Providing me with a B minus curve: In the event that I ever dreamed of having a future post graduation, it sounds really awesome to employers when you have to explain why you were not able to get all As from a school that they could not believe is even recognized by the ABA let alone distributes grades

.
5. Inspiring Me With The Desire to Continue My Legal Education: This week I am “Bridging the Gap” which I had the sincere privilege of paying out of pocket because I do not work at a firm who would pay for my eager learning mind, let alone a firm for that matter. I am so happy to maintain a license that has gotten less activity than my driver’s license since I moved to Manhattan. My Juris Doctorate means more to me than the four hundred dollars I will have to pay to go to the course, let alone the six hundred dollars I will not make as an hourly paid employee, to learn about a profession which I am entirely not a part of. Was it not just the other day I made the mistake of lifting my laundry bag and jostling my degree’s careful placement above my cable box and said to myself “C, it is high time you frame this and hang it above your not even cubicle where you offer your “consulting services?” I sure hope that after I finish learning about trial practice and ethical rules which I will never get to implement, the CLE department will “bridge the gap” between me and the rest of professional community: Please see the link below:

http://www.familyvacationco.com/LA2Grand/grand_canyon.jpg