WELL IF SKADDEN IS EMBARASSED

It has recently come to my attention that a series of douche bags at Skadden have started ranking their fellow associates' hotness. While I do not exactly condone the behavior, I am a bit of the school of thought that this girl who was nominated the hottest associate IS NOT SO EMBARRASSED. Look, ladies let's all be honest with each other. I was not embarrassed, nor were any of my friends even if they claimed to feel degraded, to be highlighted in my freshman year's facebook. While I certainly did not deserve the attention and was later told by my lame ass boyfriend that he did it himself because "I looked angry hot," I certainly welcomed this nomination. Quite frankly, if I were not highlighted in the freshman class M&M would have pulled me off campus within the first month.

With that in mind, I am a bit disgusted by the balls on this blondie. Not only does this whore work at Skadden and make more money than I ever will see in my life, but apparently she is also hot. I sure hope she is just really photogenic and this is not some way of God telling me that good things come in 181 LSAT packages. Am I supposed to think: "Oh, poor girl. She makes 4524535235352352 a year for doing document review, is smart and is also considered really hot by her fellow very eligible bachelors?" No, I do not think so.

For the record, none of my fellow garbigities are circulating such a nomination in my favor. Furthermore, what in God's name does Skadden have to be embarrassed about? A bloody blog? Really, I am sitting at my current dumpster as we speak drafting a blog about what it is like to be only a quarter of an attorney with a salary that is comparable to an exterminator's. If Skadden's hiring partner finds the firm's culture an embarrassment, he should spend a day in my flip flops. Yes, that is right, I can wear flip flops to work.